My Ghosts Healed Me
“Nightmare Obsession” confronts the ghosts of the past and loss that seek salvation. This art exhibition of Billy Bagtas invites every individual to dive into the collective shadows that shaped who we are and how we are tethered to our family even if it causes your sanity even if it caused you to choose to abandon everything easily, including yourself.
The black, haunting figures in Bagtas’s work embody “flesh”—a heavy, symbolic weight reflecting our past actions and beliefs. They capture fragments of our ancestors, who once found solace in the wisdom of animism, a worldview that celebrated the spirit in all things. In seeking refuge in false idols, they ultimately uncovered the emptiness of those paths, overshadowed by the darkness of colonialism and feudalism that sought to sever us from this profound connection. This oppressive shadow manifests as misguided choices and deep-rooted pain, reminding us of the fragility of faith and how easily we can be led astray.
These figures embody our ancestors’ reverence for animism—a consciousness that recognizes the spirit in all things and calls us to care, love, and resist. In a society intent on erasing this bond and undermining our potential, animism remains a fierce call to defend what nurtures us and to rise against oppression. It is a love that resists—a call to reclaim what is truly ours.
In contrast, an open space symbolizes liberation, resembling a heavenly promise. This area, a mix of clean and murky waters, represents the transformation journey. As the dirty water blends with the clean, memories and emotions begin to clarify, revealing a hard-won sense of purity and truth. In this undefined territory, Bagtas wants to provide forward momentum that hints at redemption while acknowledging the struggles of the past.
Two key installations anchor the narrative: the Chair and the False God Sculpture. The chair starkly reminds us of death, urging us to confront our losses and acknowledge life’s fleeting nature. The False God Sculpture embodies the empty promises we once held onto, illustrating how trauma distorts our understanding of salvation and impedes our path to peace.
In “Nightmare Obsession,” these works reveal the delicate interplay between darkness and light, suffering and redemption. The journey from these shadowed spaces to an open future is challenging yet invites us to explore our struggles and love to disrupt violence as we seek liberation. The show illustrates that genuine peace occurs when we confront our ghosts and allow them to lead us, all while setting boundaries—not just for the sake of others but also for our well-being.
This commonality allows us to flow forward as clear water toward an existence deprived of deceits.
Joan Velasquez
